Coach Keren Eldad
Our journey in life comes with many chapters, pun intended, and my first chapter with Keren Eldad began in 2010 when we collaborated on a project in New York. Suffice to say, since then, this refreshingly positive and energetic soul has truly inspired my life. And, if you're a cat lover like me, Keren's cat jokes and metaphors subtly highlight many inspirational conversations.
At the end of 2018, I worked with Keren through an executive business coaching course, which ultimately became a pivotal time for me. The following year was a chapter in my life that signified change in many ways and ultimately led me to return to fashion and conceptualize Eve & Max. Keren gave me the motivational tools to return to my original Plan A and continue on the career path I started as a young designer in London. I am very grateful for this insightful experience that explained so much about my behavior, the self-sabotage, a general lack of mentality, and the fight for perfection—I've quit all these negative ruminations, or at best, I manage them much better.
Last spring, I joined Keren and friends in Mexico for Coach Keren's The Reset Retreat in Todos Santos, to experience a refresher course on my self-awareness skills and a recap of our work in 2018. Taking care of our mindset is an ongoing process, it's never a one-and-done, so for this year, I am working through the chapters of her debut book: Gilded, Breaking Free from the Cage of Ambition, Perfectionism, and the Relentless Pursuit of More, to keep my mental guidance in check. We all need a positive soul in our lives, and I'm thrilled to introduce you to Keren, a dear friend and my coach.
What inspired you to write GILDED, and how does it reflect your personal journey of breaking free from ambition-driven burnout? I wrote GILDED because I lived it. For years, I chased success with the kind of relentless ambition that looked impressive on the outside but felt hollow on the inside. I had everything I thought I was supposed to want—career accolades, prestige, external validation—but I was exhausted, disconnected from myself, and ultimately, deeply unfulfilled. My 'gilded cage' shattered when I lost everything I had built, forcing me to confront a terrifying question: What was I actually building? That reckoning led me to redefine success, fulfilment, and self-worth on radically different terms. Through my own transformation—and later through my work coaching some of the world's top performers—I saw how universal this experience is. High achievers are often trapped by the very things they worked so hard to attain. GILDED is the roadmap I wish I had when I was stuck in that cycle.
GILDED by Keren Eldad
You describe the "gilded cage" as a trap many high achievers fall into—can you explain what it is and why it's so common, even among successful people? The "gilded cage" is the illusion of success—the beautiful but suffocating life built on perfectionism, people-pleasing, overwork, and external validation. It's common among high achievers because we're conditioned to equate our worth with our accomplishments. From a young age, we learn that gold stars, promotions, prestige, and productivity mean we are "good" and "valuable." But the more we chase, the heavier the cage becomes. The cruel irony? The world celebrates us for our ambition. No one questions the person winning awards, landing deals, and constantly raising the bar. We only question it when they burn out, break down, or walk away. GILDED asks: What if you didn't have to hit a breaking point to realize there's another way?
What are people's biggest misconceptions about ambition, perfectionism, and success, and how does GILDED challenge those ideas? The biggest myth? That more is always better. More success, more hustle, more achievement—it's never enough, and we're told that's how it should be. GILDED dismantles this by showing that success without alignment is just glorified exhaustion. Another misconception is that perfectionism is a virtue. It's not—it's fear of wearing a fancy coat. Perfectionism isn't about being your best; it's about avoiding failure, criticism, or rejection at all costs. It keeps people stuck, small and constantly doubting themselves. And finally, the idea that rest, joy, and balance are luxuries instead of necessities: GILDED challenges the notion that slowing down is the enemy of ambition. True success isn't about doing more—it's about doing what actually matters.
For people feeling stuck or unfulfilled despite their achievements, what's the first actionable step they can take to start reclaiming their freedom and joy? Stop lying. That sounds harsh, but most high achievers are lying—to themselves. They tell themselves they love the grind. They say they'll slow down after the next big milestone. They pretend that the stress, anxiety, and emptiness they feel are just part of the deal. The first step is radical honesty. Ask yourself: If I stripped away the awards, expectations, and titles, what do I actually want? If you don't know, that's okay. But start listening for the answer. That's where freedom begins.
How has writing this book and helping others through coaching changed your definition of success and fulfilment in your life? Success, to me, is freedom. The freedom to say no. The freedom to design my life on my own terms. The freedom to be fully myself, without the need for applause. Fulfilment is presence. It's being deeply in love with the people in my life, being fully immersed in my work, and making a difference—not just for the sake of achievement, but because it feels good to give. I don't measure my success by how much I accomplish anymore. I measure it by how aligned, at peace, and joyful I feel.
How do you start your day? Mornings set the tone. I start my day with three non-negotiables: Silence before screens—I don't check my phone the second I wake up. Instead, I take a moment to be before the world comes rushing in. Movement—whether it's yoga, a walk, or stretching, I move my body to shake off stress before it starts. Intentionality—I write down one thing that will make today successful—not a to-do list, but a single, meaningful priority. A motivational tip? Stop trying to "optimize" every second. The best routines aren't rigid—they're supportive.
When you're off-duty, what's your best style tip? How do you dress for dinner with Ryan? Effortless elegance is my style mantra. When I'm off-duty, my go-to is a well-tailored blazer, great jeans, and chic Sambas (right now; I'm going through a sneaker moment). Simple, elevated, no fuss. Flattering. For dinner with Ryan? A silk blouse, high-waisted trousers, and a killer pair of heels. The key? Clothes that feel as good as they look. The best style tip I can give: Wear confidence—it's your most powerful accessory.
Wearing said outfit above, you're at dinner with six other guests (alive or dead). Who are they, and where are you? We're in Rome, dining al fresco at a hidden gem of a restaurant, where the pasta is perfect, the wine flows freely, and the conversation is electric. My six guests: Yuval Noah Harari—the multi-hyphenate genius of our time. I am obsessed with Esther Hicks—because I want her take on modern life and she really knows everything; Oscar Wilde—the sharpest wit of all time. I need his commentary on today's world and also love a gay friend always at every party. Also, I bet he is a cat person! Oprah Winfrey—a modern philosopher. Her insights on fulfilment would be golden. Plus – OPRAH! Madonna—my favorite performer of all time, the OG Taylor Swift. Iconic, Ryan—my husband, because no matter how fascinating the company, I'd want him by my side. And yes, I'm telling them all about GILDED because if there was ever a table where this conversation belongs, it's this one.
But I think someone is missing! If you know Keren well, you will also realize that one vital obsession is missing from her list: the Queen!! The late Majesty, HRH Queen Elizabeth II, would make a perfect guest, and I am sure she would have her own inspirational anecdotes to share with you, Keren!
Find your joy! You can purchase Gilded, Breaking Free from the Cage of Ambition, Perfectionism, and the Relentless Pursuit of More by Keren Eldad HERE and on Amazon.
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